Ups, Downs, All Arounds

    So. I have to start thinking that everything’s bigger than me. That makes me feel even less important, if that’s possible. Not only will my “friends” not stand up for me, Josh won’t answer the twelve (12) phone calls, countless texts, and countless online messages that I’ve been sending. So. I’m not going to bother. I knew talking to people from my past wasn’t a good idea. It never is. So. I will change who I hang out with by the time I turn seventeen. No more messages, no more e-mails, no more texts, no more anything to anyone. I disappeared off the face of the earth for a year, proving that I can do it. It’s time I disappear off the face of the earth for good, at least to where I don’t have to communicate directly with them. Such as this blog, the others, and other sites I upkeep. Maybe life will actually get decent around here, though I doubt it. Kelly went out four nights in a row so far and it appears he’s heading out again tonight. I don’t have any friends that actual live near me. I’m tired of thinking everything’s my fault because it’s not. No one’s going to be protected by my shadow any longer. It’s time they go find someone else to cower behind.

Hunting Me Down?

     So it appears that lately, people from my old high school are hunting me down and seeing as I’ve changed my fb name to something other than my name, they’re having trouble finding me. Therefore, they’re talking to other people that they are positive still talk to me and are getting the information out of them. Um…good or bad thing? Not sure yet. Haven’t got any hate mail as of yet. ;p Looks like Josh is still alive though. Funny. Should be interesting what continues on from here.

A Day of Chaos…Literally

     Today started out like any other. Until around 9am, the washing machine crapped out on us after almost seventeen years(hey! It’s as old as I’m gonna be!). Then our 94-year-old neighbor called to tell us she had an accident. Mom rushed over and turns out she tripped and fell while she was at her foot doctor’s (long story) but she drove home anyway but found herself in worse shape than she thought. So Mom drove her to Pinnacle and they were there for five hours. She should be fine as of now. Kelly got home early around 3-something to figure out what to do about the washing machine then went to his chiropractic appointment. Mom has to go spend the night over at the neighbor’s to watch her (doctor’s orders). Should be interesting what else happens today… I’m pretty sure some other drastic event will take place before today’s over…


     So, I’ve been planning to start a project and I did, today. I decided I needed a break from all the other stories I’m working on so I’m going to write a very short story (90 pages at most) using ideas for stories I’ve left unfinished years ago. I’ve already got it all planned out event-for-event, have drawn a map, and have started on the opening. The real question is: will the finished product be good? Or will I be throwing it into another pile of stories I don’t look at for another few years? ;p

A Jumble Of Thoughts


     Guess you liked my intro, seeing as you made it this far? How sweet of you to continue reading. Now, down to the juicy stuff, if you can call it that after reading that message, lol! I just finished reading James Patterson’s Angel, a Maximum Ride Novel and while it ended as the others did (you get used to one of them ending back in a lab by the end of the book: SPOILER ALERT!), I loved the part where Gazzy found the Gas-X pills (SPOILER ALERT! IN THE SAME SENTENCE TOO! *GASP!*). That was definitely the most memorable part of the book all in all. I can’t believe book eight, the FINAL (NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) BOOK (*CRYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!*) comes out almost exactly a year from now… You can tell you love a book series when you know exactly when and who introduced you to it. In my case, my math teacher, Mrs. Fox, in 7th grade. Yes, I’ve been following this series for a long time but it seems like only yesterday when Mrs. Fox was introducing us to the first one (Maximum Ride and the Angel Experiment). I agree, I’m a fanatic over this series. I’m not going to bother even trying to lie. It makes me mad when other so-called great, avid readers like me (Max, who refuses adamantly to read them), won’t read a series I suggest to them (MAX) but always complains when they have nothing to read(MAX). It’s kind of funny that the one guy who won’t read the series is the one who shares part of his name with the heroine of the series. It’s just, horribly ironic.

     NEXT UP: Josh. He doesn’t ever listen to anything I say unless I a) have to yell at him, b) my mom has to cuss him out and tell him what a horrible friend he’s being, c) well, it’s just pointless to try talking to him. When he has issues, he won’t shut up about it and expects me to give him advice and everything else. To console with him and feel bad about his issues with him. HA! When I have issues of my own, he’s talking about how wonderful he is at playing music, what the teachers are saying about him at MSA (middle and high school, and again, all about how he’s so wonderful), and continuing on about how perfect and talented he is. He doesn’t care if I’m having problems. I’ve even timed how much time I get to talk about myself and out of 7-9 hours of chatting a day, I get to say “me” for five minutes of all of it, if I’m lucky. So, you know what? Time for him to get a f****** wake up call. He starts playing piano while he’s over at my house (to spend time with me, not to show off his “superb” skills) after I tell him several times to not play it. I didn’t even mention before that. He’s supposed to get to my house by 10am, right? This is just one example, ok, he does this to me EVER SINGLE TIME he comes over. It’s 11:40 so I decide to call him to see what the hell’s going on. He doesn’t answer. I text him. 12:30 comes around and still no answer. I decide I’m just overreacting and I get online. Well look who’s online! HE IS! He doesn’t think he should have called to say that he was going to be late. He still doesn’t think so. We’ve had these discussions so many times, it’s completely ridiculous. It doesn’t get through that thick, “TALENTED” skull of his. *scoffing* If he was as talented as he keeps claiming he is, he would already have a scholarship to Julliard or some other famous school. However, he doesn’t, so in my view, he should just shut up about it already because I loathe people that brag. Another issue. He’s been dying to read one of my books that all of my MSA friends are really looking forward to. So, after months of refusing him, it took a lot for me to hand him the only printed copy I have of it. Guess what he did? He took it for about a minute then handed it back saying, “I only read the first two paragraphs. I’m going to play piano because I learned a new song.” That made me feel so f****** wonderful, as you can tell. Hence why I’m writing all of this in a blog. No, I will not ever forget him doing that and I will never forgive that either. He can’t get it through his head that I don’t want to be his friend anymore because he was never a friend to me to begin with! It’s not fair that the only people who want to be my friends are nasty, rude, and hateful towards me all the time! I’m talking about my peers here, not my adult friends who actually have a nice amount of common sense about them. That’s not what bothers me. I’ve had it and I’m letting people know in the only way I can think of where they’ll actually listen. If I have to spend 2,000 words telling them all this, I will do it in a heartbeat. I’m sick and tired of it and I’m warning you for the last time: I could have been your friend but now that you have decided I am to be your enemy, I’m still fine with that but I will give you a head’s up. Your life will be hell from here on out.

     No new issues with Kelly as of yet. I guess that’s a good thing but I can’t help feeling that they’ve got something planned. Life’s been going pretty fast for me lately and I have to say that I like it. I guess I’ve finally accepted the fact that, however much I am adverse to certain changes at times, it’s going to be a roller coaster ride from here on out and after that, just the fast lane. It would be interesting to know exactly what type of car I am riding in in the fast lane. Just saying. ;p Wow, this has got to be my longest blog yet. There are exactly this many words in this entire thing!: 1,148!

New Look, Same Blog

     I have changed my blog’s appearance and it will stay this new way for a month before I change it back. This symbolizes a new start and also my seventeenth birthday. I will change it back to the original look the day after my birthday so for those who preferred the original appearance and layout, don’t worry. I just felt like going with a misty look this time. ;p


     I was about fifteen in the first dream where Josh and I had just gotten back from a walk or something, mom was at the store, and these two men were in my house trying to steal anything of value. They didn’t try to harm us but told us to stay out of their way. I turned around to tell Josh to get my gun but he was long gone so I instead went to get Kelly’s. In the process, I found Josh hiding in a closet so while trying not to be amused at that, I went back in and shot the two thieves. Head shots, the biggest got two in the head, the smaller got one. Both of them turned to look at me as though it didn’t faze them at all before they collapsed. Then they started dragging themselves toward me at which point, I grabbed a baseball bat and started beating their heads in because obviously bullets weren’t working. Mom got home just in time to witness the final blow and they laid still.

     The next dream is after the first but for some reason, I was eight or nine this time. We were in the middle of taking a test and my phone wouldn’t stop ringing even though I had made sure that the battery had been taken out and everything. Regardless, it wouldn’t stop making noise. So the teacher was getting pissed and tried to take it away from me but I refused. Instead, he went to get discipline and I packed up my stuff immediately. I went out of the classroom and found one of my favorite teachers standing there. I asked her (in a very distressed voice while breathing hysterically) if I could go swing before I went to discipline because I was so upset. She immediately agreed and I cut through the entire school through an open hallway by the playground, left the school property entirely and started heading home. I was almost home when a couple of the discipline people showed up suddenly and tried to drag me back towards the school. I was freaking out by this time and was screaming bloody murder but nothing was happening. Finally, I make it home and there’s an eighteen-wheeler in the driveway so now I’m worried about what happened in the previous dream. I rush inside and mom’s talking to this guy. She turns to me and asks why the hell I’m home so early. I wanted to demand why she wouldn’t stop calling me though she knew exactly where I was but she instead told me that what’s-his-name was buying furniture from us while Kelly was out of town. About that time, the principle from my elementary school pulls into the driveway and starts coming towards the door. I run to my room and barricade myself in. I hear some fighting between mom and my principle but then she tells them I’m never going to attend their horrible school again.

     Like I said. Some strange dreams, I’m not making them explicitly graphic, and sleeping for fourteen hours is obviously not a very good thing for me, lol! Have a good Presidents’ Day.

Sunday Craze

     The Putnam County Spelling Bee. If Josh plays any of those songs over here again, I shall murder him! I’m pretty sure I have the entire play memorized by now, which is most definitely sad. We tried watching a couple of movies on tv but he fell asleep through part of one of them. It was hilarious. I kept thinking he was dead because he wasn’t making a sound for once in his life! His mom must really enjoy it when he sleeps, lol! I’m just kidding, Josh…..mostly. Not much else occurred.

Saturday Madness

     Josh came over to spend the day and ended up staying the night as well. It’s been pretty interesting so far. Piano music drowning out all thoughts, playing Sims ’til I don’t know how early in the morning, watching movies, and playing catch with Josh’s face. He didn’t have as much of an issue with the post that is still holding up the house though he keeps thinking that the floor is vibrating. In all honesty, I think it’s all in his head, lol!

Pet Owner Issues

     The next door neighbor has a ten-year-old kid. His father could be his great-grandfather and his mom shouldn’t have had a kid at forty-something. The kid is spoiled rotten and is given everything he wants. He has a cat that he tortures and throws in the pool often and a dog that he never plays with or takes care of. I don’t even want to discuss the other pets he’s had. It breaks my heart to see his dog over there with no one to play with and whenever they’re out of town, we always babysit their pets. In the week or so they’re gone, they actually get attention and love but as soon as their owners get back, they’re back to being depressed again. Just wanted to voice something else that I hate about this world, not that it will do anyone or anything any good. Can’t even call animal control around here when a puppy tries chewing through a white fence to get to freedom because his owners were out of town and didn’t bother to feed it. Called animal control, they said they couldn’t do anything and told us to call the cops. We called the sheriff, nothing, they sent us back to animal control. They did absolutely nothing and that cute little puppy died from choking to death on wood splinters because it was trying to get out. There’s so much in life that certain people like us (underage) can’t do but if you have the authority to do something, use it and fix things. Just because I’m under 18 (397 days left) means I can’t do anything and laws make it impossible to do anything against criminals. So, maybe this will be read by someone who cares and who can do something. Maybe not. Either way, it’ll be out there.